Thunderous Silence - The Art of Quieting Your Mind

I should start this out by saying that in no way, form, or fashion am I a sport psychologist. However, I am someone who grew up playing competitive sports. One that struggled mightily with controlling the chaos in my mind during competition.

In a singular, as well as slightly narcissistic, sports like tennis and long-distance triathlons, the internal chaos of fear, uncertainty, and doubt can be crippling. I've often described my personal situation as something similar to the radio in my 1979 Camaro. It had dials that you tuned in the station and sometimes it would register it perfectly and other times it was just slightly off. I, unfortunately, was one of those kids that had a brain that struggled to get the station locked in. I would almost be on target but it was a constant struggle to clear the static. This manifested itself in sports when I would let the lack of confidence creep in, which often resulted in negative outcomes. Now I could take the easy road and blame my parents for the poor parental lifestyle choices they made in the late '60s and early '70s, and often I do. But, truth be told, it’s a waste of energy. I don't feel placing blame would be positive or necessarily changes the outcome. The reality is that I am the one who is in control of my situation, especially in my head, regardless of whether it’s sports, work, or life-related.

Two phrases I use quite frequently for my own personal benefit to help "dial in my radio" include "thunderous silence" and "quiet your mind". The juxtaposition "thunderous silence" to hone in the competitive fury needed to succeed and "quiet your mind" to silence the negative chatter and self-doubt that can ultimately creep inside my head during a stressful match or the latter phases of a triathlon. I'm a true believer that the mind gives out long before the body will and that there is always a "little more' in the tank than you might think to exist. The key is to put to rest this negative noise and forging forward toward your goals. For me, its reminding myself to quiet my mind of the chaos and leverage the thunderous silence to persevere. It’s my own little recipe of what most people call mindfulness, which is a form of meditation. Essentially, it's a simple and effective way to gain control of the fearful and unruly thoughts that can plague an athlete.

If you are an athlete of any kind seeking a mental competitive edge, especially a tennis player or a triathlete, two great books to read include "Tennis: Winning the Mental Edge" by Allen Fox, Ph.D. and "Iron War: Dave Scott, Mark Allen, and the Greatest Race Ever Run" by Matt Fitzgerald. While they both center on specific sports, the value they deliver deals with the mental fortitude to win in any sport. I have read both multiple times and often refer back to them for helpful hints as I prepare today.

What strategies do you use to settle your thoughts?

Rituals

Rituals are an integral part of all sports and athletes will do almost anything to ensure they win. They range from carrying lucky items, eating certain meals, to wearing articles of clothing not necessarily meant for their particular sport or gender for that matter. When it comes to these rituals, tennis is no lingering second place to any sport.  

Growing up playing competitive tennis from juniors through college I've seen quite few different ways that people approach a match. Players do all kinds of uncanny things to ensure they win. I've witnessed players wearing the same pair of socks throughout a tournament, not ever looking at the draw, listening to the same song over and over as well as being obsessed with the tension of their strings. During a match you get guys who love to talk on each change over and others who would rather punch you in the face than even look your way. Examples of rituals in pro-tennis range from today's Rafael Nadal, who is OCD with his in match quirks of pulling at the back of his shorts and scarfing a banana down on every 3rd change over to my favorite of the past, John McEnroe. McEnroe's tirades were not because he was a complete caustic human being but instead, were as much a part of his game and style as his serve and volley.  

Me personally, my rituals include tugging at my left sleeve, bouncing the ball 5 times before each serve, taking a few deep breaths as I am getting ready for a return, and most of all straightening my string pattern after I've won or lost a point. This last one is particularly important to me due to the fact that I need to simply quiet my mind before the start of the next point.  

You may think this is all completely nuts, to which I would agree, but these rituals are actually coached and encouraged in junior tennis. Unlike team sports, and with the exception of doubles, you as a singles player are solely responsible for the good and the bad on the court. This pressure, and the pressure to the win, is unbelievable on a kid and only slightly diminishes as an adult. My personal coach when I was young, Al, encouraged me to approach every match the same way each time and to clear my head of the noise. These rituals help me to follow a consistent pattern on the court which in turn helped to ensure a calm and balanced approach to the match.  

Today, I still approach the game the same way, although maybe less intense, and follow my match rituals to a "T" to ensure success. I don't always win but like the old saying goes "I hate losing more than I like winning" and the rituals are the first step to not losing.